Zipper Merge
Push your key into my ignition babe
Let’s go for a ride
You know I been riding and driving
To Uranus and back in miles
It’s a beautiful sunny day
Our adventures are underway
Just sit back and close your eyes
But you gotta watch out!
We ain’t the only people on the way
And the way they drive how are they still alive
It heats me up to say
Now I know we gotta live and learn
But if you wanna take a quicker turn
You gotta know how to zipper merge
Why don’t you know how to zipper merge?
Now I know you think you’re being polite
Ooh but that ain’t right
We gotta use all the lanes tonight
(All the lanes)
So we don’t have to get in a fight
(Give em the step by step)
(Step one)
Relax your shoulders
You’re gonna do great
(Step two)
Put down your phone you stupid idiot
And concentrate
(Sorry ‘bout that step three)
Fill all the lanes up
Even the ones that they’re gonna close
(Step four)
Drive all the way down
Until you’re up against the cones
You’re almost done!
Try not to brown in your gown
(Step five)
Take turns every other car
It looks like a zipper if you’re looking down
Now I know we gotta live and learn
But if you wanna take a quicker turn
You gotta know how to zipper merge
Why don’t you know how to zipper merge?
Now I know we gotta live and learn
But if you wanna take a quicker turn
You gotta know how to zipper merge
Why don’t you know how to zipper merge?
Now I know you think we’re being rude
(So rude)
And I know you think you’re helping too
By making sure everybody follows your rules
Follows your rules
But my dude
It’s the truth
Why don’t you
Get a clue
If we cruise
Zipper you
And I too
Can get through
It’s a beautiful
Human who do
Something new
Me and you
Now we’re cool
Drink a brew
With the crew
Barbeque
Drink more booze
Drop a deuce
In the pool
Through my tools
At your glutes
While you do
Jujitsu
Now you’re loosing
A tooth
And you’re suing
Me too
I say truce
We were fools
Ink a few
New tattoos
That say I want to zipper with you
Now I know we gotta live and learn
But if you wanna take a quicker turn
Woah you gotta know
Woah you gott know how to zipper merge
Aye
Aye Ha!